Scunthorpe United v Bristol R

Saturday, April 30, 2005

Football League Two

Scunthorpe United :
Musselwhite, Byrne, Crosby, Butler, Ridley, Taylor (Keogh 77), Kell (Hinds 55), Baraclough, Beagrie (Corden 88), Hayes, Torpey
Subs not used:
Evans, Parton

Bristol R :
Clarke, Edwards, Anderson, Elliott, Bass, Disley (sent off 53), Savage (Trollope 29), Carruthers, Williams, Walker, Forrester (Gibb 58)
Subs not used:
Haldane, Agogo, Ryan

SULSESC REPORT

by Neil Wright at Glanford Park

SO here we are then, last home game of the season and the altitude sickness continues to worsen.

Neil Holland is having his Scunny stag night tonight, two speedway matches to watch following the mighty Scorpions home and away and, to top it all, the United Presentation dinner on Monday night. So much to take in in three days!

We begin with the throng of SULSESC meeting as usual in the Honest Lawyer before the Saturday match, together with a few welcome guests - Mel, Tracy, young Tremayne to name but a few.

Talk was of how a victory today would really set us up for the final away fixture next week away to Shrewsbury. Forecasting time came around - 1-0 to the Iron, a 0-3 defeat said the cynics, 0-0 to make it a nerve wracking finish next week, but mostly everyone was hoping for a United victory!

To cut a long story short, Utd won 4-0. Torpey finally managed to score twice, Hayes contributed with a masterful lob of the 'keeper early in the second-half and, to round it all off, Cleeeeeeeeveland scored a pearl of a header. The only sour note was Richard Kell suffering a break of his left leg.

So to the evening and the occasion of Mr. Holland's Scunny Stag Night, with a few 'token birds' in tow. We began, as the pre-match had finished, in the Honest Lawyer. The future Mrs. Holland left after a few drinks with the request "look after him"...

Having reassured Karen that all would be okay, we left the Lawyer and began the journey to Club 2K, Scunny's 'premier nightspot' via of course the many drinking houses now to be found in town.

First to the Bluebell, an interesting venue, rich in choices of real ale, but somewhat lacking in ambience.

Next to the Britannia. For those of you unfamiliar with the Scunthorpe of old (by that I mean the 80s) there was always one pub you would not be seen dead in - and this, dear readers, is it!

Having survived 21 years of my life without drinking in this very establishment, I found myself standing on a sodden carpet wondering what the hell I was doing here. Thankfully our visit was shortlived and it was onwards to the Mary Rose.

A quaint little bar, small, long, thin with a back exit - and then it was on to the Geneva Cafe' Bar (or, as I prefer to call it, the old Dixon's Electrical Shop). This, my friends, is an excellent bar! Bouncers on the door but, once inside, a rocking venue, so much so that this could have been the place to stay for the remainder of the evening. Alas, at this point, our large contingent became split up - some continued to Club 2K, some chose to eat!

Allow me to continue with the events of the Stag. It was on to Club 2K, or Dev's temporary home as it is also known. Once inside, those still with the Stag did their own thing and I myself departed reasonably early but I am reliably informed Mr Holland had a pleasant evening and went home at a suitable hour.

And so to Sunday, and the Scorpions away to Buxton in the Conference Trophy. Now, for those of you who have never been to the home of the Hitmen, Buxton's track lies on the top of a bleak hill in the Peak District and has to be the remotest speedway venue ever! A pleasant afternoon was had by the six of us who attended, the highlight being Mel and Tracy getting covered with wet shale early in the second heat! The Scorpions, however, lost by three points in the final heat.

Having not seen speedway in Scunny since the late 70s/early 80s, I for one certainly had an enjoyable afternoon. And on Bank Holiday Monday, there was the return fixture for us to take in at Scunny's new track on Normanby Road, which the Scorpions won.

The evening arrived and it was on to the end-of-season dinner.

An elaborate occasion with United's finest suited and booted, we joined some 450 fellow supporters in the Marquee, erected next to the Donny Road Stand adjoining the Iron Bar. The food was varied, if somewhat lacking in vegetable substance, and being seated on table number 43, the meal took some time to enjoy but eventually the banquet was finished and it was time for the presentations.

Speeches from our own SULSESC member and United director Simon Elliott, chairman Steve Wharton and Brian Laws offered encouraging words to the effect that the job wasn't finished yet, that we weren't settling for second and that it was the Championship we wanted.

As for the awards, Andy Butler was unanimously voted the SULSESC Player of the Year, the trophy being presented by Andy Kerr. The photo was taken, the players dispersed and the evening took on a different tack as the 12 of us slowly began to disperse at the end of a long but enjoyable weekend.